Half Way!

I can't believe it but as today ends, June 30, 2011, so does the first half of this year.  Where has the time gone?

It seems it was only a few weeks ago that we were buried in snow drifts and it was freezing cold and now here it is summer time.

The beginning of the year started nice but by the second week, it was cold and blustery and then the snow came and it came and it came.  We were snowed in for days, no mail service, stores closed as people couldn't get in to work, let alone customers being able to get in to make purchases.

But by the end of February, it was all behind us as we looked towards March and a pleasant change of weather and it wasn't a bad March.  We got a lot of rain and I mean a lot of rain.  I worried at the time that it would rain itself out and by summer time, we'd be sweltering in the heat and dry as a bone.  Guess what?  We are sweltering in the heat and dry as a bone.

April wasn't to bad and we got some good rains during that month but then May came along and it began to warm up, a lot warmer than usual but nothing like this month has been.  We made the record books for the second hottest month with temps over 90+ degrees for 29 of the 30 days.

And a lot has happened in my personal life during this first six months.  My brother, my niece and my daughter and I made a trip to Iowa to move our mother to a nursing home in January.  However, she was removed by our younger sibling in February and sad to say, passed away in March.

It has been hard for me to accept her passing and I still think I need to call her when something happens or especially on Sunday afternoons.  For years, every Sunday afternoon we had a nice long visit by phone and I miss those calls and miss her voice and I miss telling her what is going on or what is happening and I miss her telling me what she has been thinking about or doing.

Then in May, my daughter decided she was going back to the city.  She just isn't a country girl and was not happy here and I felt bad with her living in that small trailer.  She got it sold, packed up her things and she and my grandson loaded the truck and she is settled into her new apartment and is working part time at a local television studio as she looks for full time work and today she had a good interview so we are keeping our fingers crossed it will work out for her.

It has been a little hard going out and not seeing the trailer there or seeing her every day but we talk on the phone and I know she is happy and that is the most important thing.

I thought about selling off the place and moving to an apartment but the more I thought about it, I knew I would not be happy.  I am a country girl and I do love the rural living and having a neighbor so close and being in town, I know I'd feel like a fish out of water and regret it so I've decided to stay right here for as long as I can.

So the first half of the year has been full of ups and downs, some health problems but are being taken care of and I'm finding a new side of myself.  It gets a little lonesome at times, but yet I manage to stay busy and keep occupied and the way time is going, I must be doing something right.

Now that is what happened in my area of the country.  However, elsewhere, there have been huge destructive and killer tornadoes.  The worst I believe so far is the one at Joplin, Missouri.  I lived there for over 10 years and very familiar with the area that was hit as I even lived in that part of the city for a while.  It is devastating to see the destruction and to hear the stories and worse the loss of life.

There have been horrible fires out of control in the Texas  and the southwest.  I'm sure there will be more in other states if it continues to be so dry.  People have been evacuated from their homes, business closed and loss of property and land mass has caused more problems.  And they are battling a fire that is jeopardizing a nuclear facility.

On the other hand are the floods to the north.  Whole towns being devastated and suffering loss to property and crops.  From North Dakota to the southern edges of Nebraska and Iowa, the river has risen higher than it has in years and has wrecked havoc.  A small town not far from my home town was covered in waters and the farmers watched as their fields filled with water and the crops gone.  A cousin who lives in Omaha has evacuated her home and is waiting and it could be another two months before she will know or even be able to get back to her home.  She and her husband also lost their travel trailer that they set up along the river.  The waters came up faster than anyone thought and they weren't able to get to it in time.  There is a huge nuclear generating plant that is in danger from the flood waters as well.

The earth is a changing and growing planet and weather changes are just a part of it.  We all try to understand and there are a few who get some grandiose ideas that we are the cause or that it is near the end time, but in actuality, this has been going on for eons.  Long before man walked upon the earth, it went through weather changes and it has survived.

We will now but we will have to suffer a little through cold, snow, rains, flood, heat, fires and tornadoes.

So as we end this first half of the year, what can we look forward to for the next half? I'm hoping and praying that it will be better, but somehow I know that whatever is to come, I can't change it, nor can anyone else, so we will complain about the cold and the snow and we will complain about the rains and again about the heat and the dryness.  After all, what is a better conversation starter than, "Isn't this weather something else?"

In The Good Ole Summertime!

Summer is officially here, however we have been having summer type weather for the biggest part of this month.  It has been unseasonably warm for June here and dry.  We haven't had the fires like they've had in Arizona and Texas but if we don't get some relief soon, it is quite possible we will be seeing more fires in our neck of the woods.

I know a lot of people think I'm nuts but I actually enjoy this warm weather.  True when it is unbearably hot and humid, I do seek relief inside but if I can, I'll be outside every chance. 

Just like yesterday.  I keep my thermostat set at 82 degrees and there are warm spots and cold spots in my house and I try to stay away from those cold spots as I just can't handle that cold.  Yesterday was kind of a cloudy day so it was very cool in the house and I got so cold that I actually went outside to "thaw out".  No kidding.  I was so cold, I felt as if I were moving in slow motion and was beginning to ache all over.  I stayed outside and soon felt good again.  I didn't do a lot of work out there as then I would have really felt the heat but just sitting on the porch wasn't all that bad.  We had a light breeze which helped.

Now today is entirely different.  We started out pleasant with a south wind that felt really good this morning but as the day has worn on, the temp has gone up and the wind isn't quite as appealing.  Feels like someone is blowing a hair dryer on you.  But at the same time, if we didn't have the wind, it would be utterly miserable out there.

The humidity isn't as bad today so I have been in and out several times and didn't have the breathing problem I sometimes have when it is high. 

I remember growing up without air conditioning and only the use of a fan that just seemed to blow the hot air around.  Our house had a lot of trees and on hot afternoons my mother always thought we should rest.  My bed was placed so that I was right in front of the only window in my room.  If we had a breeze, it really wasn't that bad, otherwise, yes it was hot and about the only resting we got done was to lie there and wish it was cooler.

The nights were always cool unless there was no breeze at all but for the most part, sleeping wasn't all that bad.  And during the daytime hours, my brother and I played outside, usually under the shade of a huge old Elm tree we had in the front yard.  We really didn't mind the heat.  Maybe it was because we were interested in playing with our toys or just sitting watching the clouds in the sky.

I remember riding my bike across town to go to the swimming pool and how good that water felt when I first got in it.  And I'd be all cooled off by the time I had to leave to go home, only to be sweating and hot again when I got there but yet still feeling the effects of an afternoon in the pool.

Every now and then my brother and I would get to go out to the farm to stay with our cousins.  Now, none of us were bothered by the heat.  We ate breakfast and was out the door and sometimes I'm not sure we even came in for lunch unless my aunt yelled loud enough for us to hear her.  And other times, we'd take a sandwich with us to eat out in the "wilderness," that is what we called being out in the field.  We all had great imaginations.

We would play outside all day and well into the evening.  The heat just never seemed to be a problem when I was young so maybe I'm conditioned.  LOL! 

As a young woman, I would lie in the sun to get my tan.  Of course, now I realize that was not the smartest thing to do and I guess I am one of the lucky ones that didn't ruin my skin but I'm sure it didn't help it either, nor did I get any cancer which is one of the biggest dangers. 

I don't mind the summertime and the heat if I don't have to do a lot while outside in it.  I do try to stay in the shade and I will admit that I do stay inside a lot but when I get chilled, outside I go.  True, if I had my druthers, I would take spring or fall but I can withstand the summer time.  And for me, winter could just disappear entirely and I wouldn't miss it one little bit. 

I grew up in an area which had harsh winters and didn't like them then and don't like them now.  I've seen snow and played in it and now I don't care if I see it again or not.  I've been in freezing temps where my fingers and toes got numb and I definitely don't care for that. 

So guess I'm weird but I still like the good ole summertime and I hope you have a great summer too.

Party Time!

I love to give parties and entertain.  I think part of the fun is the planning and the anticipation as the day approaches for the party.

Last year when my daughter was here, we set up a canopy outside and put lights all around it and tables and chairs and of course a portable bar along with a CD player and the party was on.  It started on the 4th of July and we had a couple more during the summer.  Everyone looked forward to our "Party Central" parties.  

There was nothing fancy, just family, friends and neighbors who all joined together for an evening of laughter, dancing and just plain fun.

So it is that time again to open up "Party Central".  Only this year there is a big change.  We will have everything on the screened in porch and plan to add some food.  One end will be set up buffet style, one end will be a conversation area and the center section will be free for all those free spirits who just have to move to the music.

The lights have been put up and we'll have some decorative lights as well.  The grill will be set up on the north patio for burgers and hot dogs and inside we'll have whatever the guests decide to bring with them to share.  The bar will be open with plenty of ice and some sodas but everyone will need to bring their own special spirits if they choose.  Music will be playing with an assortment of CD's that daughter and I have and if anyone wants to bring their own, we'll accommodate.

For a successful party, I want all my guests to enjoy themselves and feel comfortable.  So I try to make them a part of the celebration and evidently my enthusiasm works as everyone seems ready and willing to help.

But now, I'm in the planning stages and to me that isn't a chore but just part of the fun.  I'll make my list of food items I need to get and have on hand, plenty of ice and sodas, cups, plates and whatever else I can think of before that final day.

Fireworks will be going off all around us plus I'm sure we will have plenty of our own right here as my grandson will not disappoint and I think a few of the guests are bringing some as well.

I just get excited thinking about it and still have over two weeks before it happens but that is the way I am.  As I said, I love to entertain and have fun with family and friends.  We would have had a head start by having a party over Memorial Day but daughter was moving that weekend so we'll just have our big blow out on the 4th.

And I'm sure there will be more with one last one before we have to say good bye to summer and hello to winter.  We had one in late fall last year so as long as it is not freezing, we'll be out there at Party Central.

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY EVERYONE!!!!!   HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!!!!!!

An Empty Nest, The Second Time Around

We have our children and we watch them grow, wishing they were bigger when they are little and then wishing they were little once they are young adults.  But all the while, we still enjoy them from birth to that first step out on their own.

It is hard when that high school graduation comes and you watch that child you have raised from a tiny squirming baby into a smart and anxious to meet the world young adult.  You wish you could find a way to keep them just a little longer and they are just waiting to get out there and show the world they are adults and can make it on their own.

Some do succeed the first time out, while others might have to retreat back home to regroup and start over but eventually they do leave the nest and are on their own.  And we watch with pride as they take off in their next chapter of their lives with jobs, more schooling or even marriage and a family.  They may have left the nest but at the same time we still have a tiny string attached.

Whether they want to admit it or not, they won't let go of that string either.  Things happen in their lives that no one can foresee and that string is their lifeline to go home when they have no place else to go.

This happened to my family.  The youngest daughter came home, even moving out of state to stay with us until she could get on her feet and resume her life.  The oldest had married and was doing well even after a divorce and starting out on her own.  But the company she worked for sold out and she was out of a job.  She continued to try to make a go of it with part time work and unemployment while she looked for a job but it became evident that she would have no choice but to sell off all her belongings except for a few personal items and to let her house go.

She was so excited when she bought her home and we were excited for her but when that day came that she had to walk away, we told her we were here and she could come here.  We call it a twist of fate as we planned for her to buy a trailer to set up next to our house and stay until she could find work and get back on her feet, but then we got the word that my husband was seriously ill.

So coming home was a two fold event.  We were going to help her by giving her a place to live and she would be here to help with her father.  And when he passed, she remained to be here for me.  We gave each other support as she found a job and worked, knowing that one day she would return to the larger city from where she had moved from because eventually the work would be there and it was where her friends were and it was her home too.

That day came a little sooner than I expected but she had the opportunity for a job and to find a place to live and so she packed up what few items she had in a U-haul and sold the trailer and today she left her job here to go to her new place and get settled over the weekend and start her new job the first of the week.

I've tried to prepare for this but it is hard knowing that I won't be seeing her come home from work, or visiting with her in the trailer or here in the house.  Our little outings to the store or to go out to eat will be missed as well.  Even though we were close, we had our space but at the same time we were just a few feet away and when we needed to talk or just to listen to music and relax, we did it.

Now, I go out there and I see the spot where the trailer sat for a year and a half and it looks so bare and it is hard to believe it is gone.  But the grass will return and one day there won't be any sign that the trailer sat there and she was so close.

The empty nest syndrome has hit again.  We are much older but at the same time, she still is my child, maybe not a young one just starting out as she has her own child, a soon to be 21 year old.  But we had a second chance and now she has flown the coop again.  I'm sad but at the same time I'm happy for her.  I want what is the best for her and this move is for the best.

So I can sit here and mope or I can pick myself up and stay busy, visit with my friends and look forward to the visits I'll have from her and my other daughter and my grand kids.  The nest may be empty but the string is still attached and I know they will be here to visit and that is the way it should be.  They each have their own lives and the lives of their children as it is a never ending circle.

One day they will experience the empty nest and I hope they will look at it as I do.  It may be empty now, but it is always home and they are always welcome and there is the telephone.

Memorial Day 2011

Today we honor our fallen military whether they served in war time or peace time, they each gave of themselves to protect and defend this country and our freedoms.  Somehow a thank you just doesn't seem enough for some and yet we are all very thankful and grateful for their service and their sacrifice.

My husband, a veteran, was proud of his service and it reflected in the life he led as well as the teachings he gave to his daughters and grandchildren.  His hope as with all of us is that one day our children and grandchildren might not ever have to face the enemy on foreign ground.  But should they have to serve, they will do so with dignity and the knowledge that they are serving their country and their families and will be proud too.

Just as we have faith and believe in God, we know that he is with us and with our fighting men and women.   They fight for all our freedoms including our freedom of religion and the right to believe in God.

My daughter and I went to visit my husband's grave and I always get that feeling of patriotism and pride as we approach it seeing the flags and the decorations.  Today we were honored to see the fly over as well.  It was a lovely day so many families were out to attend the memorial service at the cemetery and to visit the final resting spot of their loved ones.  Being a national cemetery, it gives a person a sense of pride and to know that those there have been honored so.  It tugs at the heart as well knowing the loved ones are now away from us.  The Ft. Gibson National Cemetery at Ft. Gibson, Oklahoma is like all the other national cemeteries but this one is more special because our own loved one is there. 

I commend the commander of the cemetery and the staff and workers as they make sure that everything is clean, the grass mowed and each grave marked with its own personal flag.  The drives are lined with flags and the Officer Circle is lined with the largest flag in the center flown at half staff.   A person cannot visit there and not feel the love and devotion that has been given to each and every grave and the grounds.

As this day ends, I salute all our military men and women who are serving now and may God be with each and every one of you.  And I salute those who have served in the past.   Thank you just doesn't seem enough but it comes from the heart and may God keep you in his protection.

The Decision

Lately I have been trying to make a big decision.  A very hard decision.  My daughter will be moving back to Tulsa soon so that means I will have this big old house and large yard all to myself.  It takes two days and sometimes two and a half days just to do the mowing and trimming and with my asthma and allergies, I have thought that I might try to sell the place and move into an apartment in town.  I won't move to Tulsa but there is a nice little town about 8 miles north of me that has everything I need and since I already bank there and do most of my shopping there, it would be the ideal location.

But my dilemma is that for the last several years and mean several, I have always lived in a rural area away from town and always had a lot of room on each side so my neighbors weren't right next door.  I've enjoyed the solitude and when my husband was here, we both enjoyed being out away from the hustle and bustle. 

But now I am left with this big house and yard and outbuildings and I really don't need all this space or the maintenance that comes with home ownership.  I've put the figures together several times and I could live in a rented apartment for about the same that it costs me to live here.  Of course, this house is paid for so there is no mortgage payment but there is insurance and taxes and high utility bills plus all the maintenance, so I would be transferring where the money is spent, primarily.

The next big obstacle in this decision making is what do I keep and what do I dispose of.  I have a houseful of furniture and most of it has to go.  Along with all the little knick knacks I've collected through the years and assorted junk.  I've walked through the house making note of what is absolute in keeping and what is on the questionable list.

I definitely will keep all the family pieces plus a couple of the antiques we have retained and there are a few things my husband made that I just can't part with but again something will have to go.  I don't want to rent a storage shed as that is just another cost plus the security isn't all that great unless it is one that I can see personally. 

So that means that I am thinking of a 2 bedroom even though it will run a little more, but I really need the extra room for storage and will be used for the computer and my sewing machine and all my fabric and yarn and thread for my crocheting.  I will still have some things that I will have to store, like the Christmas and other holiday decorations.

And speaking of Christmas decorations, since I go all out and really light up the place around here.  I have at least 10 if not a dozen tubs full of decorations and lights, cords and outlets and you name it, I have it.  That will have to be cut down and again, there are certain things I will keep so it will be hard to dispose of the others.  My daughters will have to take their share of the china.  Once I pack it up for them, I won't store it for them so it will be up to them to take it and store it or use it or whatever.  I have several other things I was going to pass down so they will have to take them or they will be put out at the sale.

And that is another thing.  The sale.  I can't decide if I should use an auctioneer and keep my fingers crossed it will be a good sale or just try to advertise and sell it all myself.  I could have a weekly yard sale and still have stuff left over so it is a big problem.  We downsized when we moved here but we still brought a lot with us and as it goes with everyone, we have added to it as well.

So what to do?  I've had someone show interest in the house but doesn't mean they will buy it or when.  And I'm not sure if I could sell it.  I'm going to ask a ridiculously low but reasonable price and it will be a bargain if someone pays what I'm asking.  We bought it more or less on a "fire sale" basis and so that is what I will try to sell it for.  And I'm throwing in a few incentives to make it more attractive, like the golf cart, riding mower and even the generator if they will pay my price.  If not, then we will have to negotiate.

As I told my oldest daughter last night, I think the reason the decision is so hard is that I have never had to make a decision like this by myself.  My husband and I always made the decisions together but now I don't have anyone but myself.  I don't want to feel I made a mistake after I've done it but at the same time, I'm not sure how long I can really stay here and keep it up.

This was our retirement home and it has a lot of good and bad and sad memories.  I will have to part with a lot of things I've enjoyed through the years but maybe it is time for it.  Sooner or later, it would all have to be sorted and gone through and sold or what ever and it would be up to my daughters to do all of that, so maybe I should do it now and give them what I want them to have, keep what I absolutely need and want and let the rest go.

It is a decision that is hard to make and I go from day to day trying to make up my mind.  Looking at the pros and cons and trying to see what is the best solution.

May Day - a remembrance from the past

MAY DAY!  Does anyone remember how we used to celebrate this day?

I can remember when I was in grade school and we were divided up in teams and given pastel colored crepe paper streamers.  The tether balls had been removed from the poles and our teacher would take the end of our streamers to tape to the top of the pole and then helped guide us as we wove in and out.  One group would go clockwise while the other went counterclockwise.  The streamers made a colorful braided affect on the pole and we would stand back to admire our decorated pole and clap.

Every year we looked forward to the May Pole dance as we called it.  If May Day happened to fall on a weekend day, we always decorated the poles on Friday before so when we drove by the school, we could admire them.

But the fun part came from the week before as we cut and pasted pieces of construction paper into little baskets.  We might decorate them with crayons or pieces of lace or trim our mothers had. Sometimes we would cut up the lacy looking paper doilies to use for decoration or to cover the outside of the basket.  Once the baskets were all made and of course we knew just how many to make as we would make a list of those we wanted to "hang" the baskets for.

We would sit around the table under the supervision of our mother so we didn't put too much or too little in each basket.  We always had the small pastel colored mints and spanish peanuts.  After the baskets were filled with the goodies, my brother and I would scour the yard picking every wild violet we could find so we could add the tiny flowers to the baskets.

My mother would place all the baskets in a small box or sometimes on a cookie sheet and we loaded up in the car as my dad began driving around our small town stopping at the houses my brother and I wanted to "hang" a basket.

We would get out of the car and carry the basket to the porch, set it down and then yell out "May Basket" and run as fast as we could back to the car, hoping to get back safely before we were caught by the receiver and given a kiss.  Of course, sometimes we wanted the kiss so didn't run as fast as other times.  HA!

It was such a fun and exciting time and the thrill of sneaking up to leave the basket on a porch or step and then yelling out and running was the most fun.  Perhaps that is one reason the holiday which is sadly forgotten now, was one of my favorites.

When we would return home, there would be several baskets on our porch which was delight and then we could take our turn at standing near the door to watch for those who were yet to come so we could chase them and hopefully catch the ones we wanted to catch.

It is a remembrance from the past and one I wish would be revived today.  We were so proud of our little baskets we made and the rewards of receiving a lot of baskets ourselves.  Maybe it was because we did live in a small rural community but I would still like to see it happen again, even if it is just the neighborhood.  What a pleasant surprise to find a small basket with a few mints and peanuts and of course the beloved wild violet.

Happy May Day everyone!