Lost Youth

This is one of those mornings that I wonder how I got old.  You know, the aches, pains and general malise.

I don't feel old.  In my mind I feel young and that is why it is so hard to understand why the body won't keep up.  I think scientist are off base.  They should be investigating why the body ages before the mind and then we could be forever young. 

As a youngster, I hated doing my chores only because it meant I couldn't go out to play.  Now in my older years, I still hate doing my chores because I can't go out to play.  So why does playing seem harder now?

I could run all the way home from school as a youngster, about a mile.  I might have a little side ache but it went away. Now, I wind myself if I run across the street to get the mail. 

I could ride my bike all day and never have a problem but now I'm lucky if I can keep it upright and steady enough to ride down the block.

As a teen, I could dance all day and all night and make moves that even a belly dancer would have envied.  So what happened.  Now, I feel like a board and the legs ache after one or two dances.  The feet hurt for days.  And no way can I twist and turn and squat and jump.

I can see myself in my mind and think, I can do that.  I used to do it all the time.  But when it comes down to actually doing it, something isn't working right.  Body, you have to listen to the mind and do what it says, not what you want.

As a youngster, I'd jump out of bed in the morning, ready for the new day.  I'd eat my breakfast real fast, get dressed and off I'd go to see what adventure I could find.  And it was hard to stop for lunch or let alone supper and I would stay out until bedtime.  Even then I never wanted to go to bed but I would and amazingly I did fall asleep fast.  Think it was from all the hard playing.

Now, I don't exactly jump out of bed, but I meander, first to the bathroom, even though I've been up two or three times in the night to use it, I still have the urge.  Then I make my way to the kitchen for that first cup of coffee.  That should start the old motor this morning.  Leisurely drinking my coffee, listening to the first news and weather reports of the day, I think about all I want to do.  I want to work in the garden, take a walk, do my daily chores and maybe even rake up a few leaves to get a head start.

Okay, I'm dressed but decide on a second cup of coffee and while doing that, will check my email on the computer and hit a couple of sites I visit.   I even have time for a couple of games of Solitaire.  Oops! I noticed it is almost lunch time.  Well, I'll get out this afternoon to the garden.  During my lunch break, I turned on the TV and there is that movie I've been wanting to see.  I'll watch it and then can get to my chores.

By mid afternoon, I'm asleep in my chair and wake up when the head bobs letting me know I've nodded off.  Then I have a stiff neck from being in an awkward position.  I've missed most of the movie but I feel refreshed so time to get to work.

It is to late to work in the garden, so maybe I can take a walk.  I'll do my housework later.  But first, I want to read a couple of chapters in that new book since I fell asleep to fast last night and didn't get them read.

Before I realize it, it is supper time.  So far I've been able to get up, get dressed, eat and watch some TV and even read three chapters in the book.  That is quite a day.  After supper, I'll take that walk and write out a list of things I have to do tomorrow.  While looking for a piece of paper, I come across the list for today.  Well, I'll do it all tomorrow.

As bedtime comes, I get settled in thinking about all the things I have to do but didn't get done and make a vow they would get done tomorrow.  Sleep comes easily as I've really had a hard day.  All that cooking, getting up and down to go to the bathroom, which is another problem but that is another topic, then I had to go get the mail, I watched TV, and even got some reading in.

I toss and turn as the aches and pains come back.  Get up to rub in the Aspercreme and try to settle back down.  Then it is time to get up to use the bathroom, back to bed and so it goes until dawn of the next morning and I get to do it all over again.

So why am I any different now than I was as a kid.  In my mind, I'm not but for some reason, the old motor isn't running as well as it did back then.  Maybe because now I am reTIRED.